Éclair Birthday Cake

The day has arrived.  I turn 24 today.

Remember, as we were making resolutions with the ringing in of the New Year, how I shared that I felt a little strange about my upcoming birthday?

I couldn't put how I was feeling into words, making me restless and annoyed.

But the words finally came to me Sunday morning, in the kitchen with the sun beaming through my lovely yellow café curtains.

I realized, standing there with a cup of coffee in my hand, for the first time in my entire life, I am no longer terrified of being an adult.

I no longer fear moving to a strange city and building a life and a home.  Paying bills doesn't scare me.  Finding my niché and developing my career is no longer a distant dream.  The thought of marriage no longer turns my stomach with fear.  And the idea of, one day, having my own little family no longer makes my throat involuntarily close up in a panic.

And knowing I was no longer terrified of these things scared the bejesus out of me.

At this time last year, I really had no idea who I was, what I wanted or where I was headed.  I was a transplant Manhattan-ite who had just decided to pursue a somewhat crazy dream of making a career out of my passion for baking.

So it's really no surprise that the thought of others being, in some form, dependent on me, was terrifying.

Today, one year older and a little wiser, many things are still uncertain about my future.  But I feel like I am chasing my dream and enjoying the adventures and obstacles along the way.  I know I will never look back with any regrets for the path I have chosen.

So I welcome 24 with open arms and a big slice of birthday cake.  The butterflies in my stomach are not there because I am scared of being a year older, but because I feel like the best is yet to come.

Of course, if Mike stopped saying it's time to trade me in for another, younger model, that would help too.

Jordan Pond House Popovers

When I was younger, my family returned to Maine each summer to visit family and friends during whatever two week period we could all align our schedules.  Even little girls have busy lives!

On one of the days during our vacation, we would drive to Acadia National Park, enjoy the views and the serenity followed by afternoon tea and popovers at Jordan Pond House.

This tradition was surely one of our classier ones and I always felt like Samantha from our American Girl books - sitting-up perfectly straight, surrounded by the rich and middle-class alike and sticking out my pinkie finger as I sipped my raspberry lemonade.

Even today, when I return to Maine in the summer, my only request is to visit Jordan Pond House.

As I have grown older, the raspberry lemonade has been replaced with coffee.  Although, if my sister happens to be visiting as well, I usually steal a few glorious sips of her raspberry lemonade.  And since she misses me, she lets me get away with it.  It's good being the older sister.

But my popover order has not changed in the least.  With just a smear of strawberry jam, I am in heaven, surrounded by mountains, trees, water and sunshine.  And it must be strawberry jam.  Other flavors just don't cut it.

I have resisted making popovers because I do not have a popover pan.  I don't have a popover pan because it won't fit in my tiny counter-top oven.  Whimper.

But with all the rain and gloom of last week, I needed to be transported somewhere sunny and warm, with just a slight breeze blowing through.  I needed to go there even if it was just through my breakfast plate.

I prepared the batter the night before so it had time to properly age before baking on Sunday morning.

The recipe was easy enough and it whipped up in no time.

Lesson: Basic Macarons

Remember a couple weeks ago when I couldn't stop blabbing about how much I love macarons?  After being assigned the task of making macarons at the restaurant, I fell deeply in love with creating, eating, researching and dreaming about macarons.

And it turns out, I'm not alone.

Since then, I have received several requests from people, trying to perfect the art of macaron-ing, to give step-by-step instructions for making macarons.

Let's begin with a few important notes.  Pour yourself a cup of coffee and join me.

First and absolutely most importantly - you need to muster up every ounce of patience possible as you practice creating these treats.  There is a lot of room for error and some things, like humidity in the air, are completely out of your control.

Did you just get home from a stressful day at work?  Do you feel fed up and at the end of your rope for the day?  Today is not the time to try making macarons for the first time.  Seriously.  Pour yourself a glass of wine, relax and try it some other time.

When you are feeling as though you have some patience to spare, make sure you also allot yourself enough time to read the instructions thoroughly, prepare everything and slowly and carefully go through all the steps.

Macarons are not the easiest of desserts, but once you become comfortable with the techniques, the creation process is actually quite enjoyable.

Feeling patient?  Have some free time?  Me too.  Tie on an apron and join me in the kitchen!

Meyer Lemon Curd

We are officially in those tough few weeks between the dead of winter and seeing the first sprouts of green life appear again on the bare tree branches.

The sky is overcast, giving off a slight mist and making it especially difficult to chose which thickness of coat is appropriate for the commute to the office.

I miss the sunshine on my face.

Wednesday's weather was particularly sullen; I longed to be laying on a beach somewhere with a margarita in my hand.

After a frustrating morning at the office, I decided to escape on my lunch hour to the Whole Foods.  Holding a pineapple was about as close as I was going to get to paradise today.

And then I saw a small barrel of sunshine.  Or at least, something that was so blindingly yellow that, in my depressed mood, it might as well have been the sunshine.

I was drawn in.  A slight squeeze gave way to the flesh, just a bit, of these beautiful, juicy, tender meyer lemons.

I stood in awe.  And then I bought a pound of them.

After much thought and consideration, I concluded the best use of these delightful fruits would be to make them into a sweet Meyer lemon curd.

Curd.  What an awful name.

Chocolate Caramel Bars

Every month, I look forward to the evening when I return home to find next month's fresh copy of Martha Stewart Living on my doorstep.  I immediately break it's fresh, crisp binding to rip open the very back page of the magazine.

I cannot even contain my excitement long enough to fish my keys out of my pocket and open the front door.  I need to know what the cookie of the month is - now!

I stand in the hallway, allowing a cookie recipe to serve as my horoscope of the month ahead.  Date and Walnut Sandwich Cookies?  Heavy sigh.  Head drops.  Long month ahead.

Chocolate Caramel Cookie Bars?  All is right in the world.

This recipe actually appeared in MSL last November and I carefully placed it in my recipe binder for some future date.  And then I forgot about it.

It sat there, neglected, until this past weekend when I was attempting to restore some order to my life through my recipe binder, which was laying open on the coffee table with this recipe accidentally (or subconsciously on purpose) exposed.

I heard a loud gasp behind me.  Mike had emerged from his studying for a coffee refill.  I turned around to see him staring, wide-eyed, mouth open at the recipe photo.

"Those...those look like really fancy Twix bars!"

And that was all I needed.  You don't deprive fancy candy bars from your guy.

Reading through the recipe, I noticed the yield of 16 bars from a 9x9 cake pan.  I held up my 9x9 cake pan and raised an eyebrow.  This seemed like a lot of bars for two people.

Since they had to be served straight from the refrigerator, I wouldn't even be able to pawn the extras off to my friends.

I knew I could easily half the recipe, but what vessel could I use that would be half the size of the recommended cake pan?  My trusty, much loved bread loaf pan!

Revelling in my genius, coffee in tow, I sinched my apron just a bit tighter and set about creating these chocoalte caramel bars on an unexpectedly sunny Sunday morning.