2013 Goals & Photos from a Summer Day on the High Line

Just four days into 2013, I already feel a bit behind and a little worn out.  I’m finding that it doesn’t help one bit to sit and think about how rested, accomplished, and in-control I had expected to feel upon returning to work after a full week off.  Sometimes life likes to remind you, in a very big way, that no matter how much you plan or how many to-do lists you make, you are rarely in control.

So, I’m a few days behind, but I wanted to put my goals for 2013, both personal and professional, in writing.  I want to hit the publish button on this post and feel like I am accountable to more than just myself for actively trying to work towards these goals.  One thing these past few days have reinforced in me is that life is far too short to not go after your dreams, not matter how impossible they might seem on the cusp of that first big jump.      

When 2012 began, instead of an actual list of goals, I had one phrase that kept repeating itself over and over in my mind: "Be kind to yourself."  That became my goal for the year ahead, recognizing that I had developed an alarming tendency to be quite harsh on myself.  There were definitely moments when I failed at this, but with each passing month, I started to be easier on and kinder to myself.

Similarly, this year there is a phrase – somewhat an extension of what I worked towards last year - that resonated with me as soon as I read it on Emily Ley's site:  "I will hold myself to a standard of grace, not perfection."  So fitting.  This is a tall order for any perfectionist, but is a much healthier way to approach life.  It’s time to realize that though I might wish and think that I can do it all, I just can’t – and that doesn’t mean I am a terrible wife (to be) or person.  Some days I just need to give myself credit for the things I am already doing, besides being part of a family, I’m also working full-time, planning a wedding, launching a business, and gearing up for a potential move – and those are just the big things!  So maybe it’s time that I stop trying to make everything just perfect, maybe it’s okay if the laundry is a little (okay, a lot) overflowing and the dishes are piling up in the sink.  It will all get done, maybe not as soon as I want, but it will all get done.

On the professional side, I have a long list of goals of where I would like to take my business over the next year:

Make it viable.

Though just in the start-up phase, I aim to make my photography business a viable part-time job by the end of the year.  The other goals are all smaller parts of making this overarching goal actually happen.  In addition, I need to file everything to ensure my business is set-up to protect everyone involved.

Complete branding.

This goal is intentionally a bit vague.  To save money, I will be responsible for all of my initial branding, which I need to complete and be aware enough to update as needed.  Eventually (whether this year or further down the road) I want to invest in a designer to truly perfect my branding.

Update website.

This goal is also a bit vague, because, while I have a few ideas of what I would like to do with my website/blog, the truth is that I am not exactly sure.  I need to talk with other people in the field and then just trust my gut enough to make whatever changes I need.  What I know right this moment is that I am not motivated to update my current website, which is potentially hurting my business.  So I either need to make myself motivated or find a new system that works better.

Blog consistently.

This might seem a little strange given the lateness in this post, but I need to create a consistent schedule for blogging, Monday through Friday.

Invest in my business, smartly.

Mike is definitely the voice in my ear on this goal, as he is the biggest proponent of spending money to make money.  But as an emerging photographer, I sometimes feel completely overwhelmed about all of the investments that seem to be part of taking a business to the next level – top notch equipment, website, blog, packaging, and workshops.  Since I am just at the beginning, I will need to pick-and-chose which investments will help me bring in the most business.

Network with area photographers.

I’m not sure why, but this is one of the scariest goals to me!  It wasn’t even until last month that I would admit to some of our family and closest friends that I was starting my own photography business!  But I’ve realized you can’t just put up a website and a blog and hope that people flock to you to have you capture their day.  It’s time to meet some people who do this successfully for a living, learn from them, and create some meaningful relationships. 

Second shoot a wedding.

This goal completely relies on the previous, because it’s tough to second shoot a wedding if you don’t know any photographers!  I have shot some portions of wedding days, but never from the beginning to end and never under the continuous time constraints of the day.

Staring out at 2013, I feel a mix of emotions - excited, anxious, scared - about everything that lies ahead. It promises to be a year of adventure and new beginnings!

A Very Special Christmas Gift & My New Workspace!

Leading up to Christmas, Mike was growing increasingly concerned that his gift to me would not be here in time.  It didn't matter how many times I told him not to worry, that I was an adult and could wait until it arrived, he continued to fret.  He knew how upset I was to spend my first Christmas without my family; he explained that he just wanted me to have something to look forward to opening.

On Christmas Eve, as I was busy pushing our tiny oven and KitchenAid mixer to their breaking points, I heard a little yelp and then the hurried scuffing of his slippers across our hardwood floors, followed by the door slamming shut.  A few moments later I heard the turn of the doorknob and him demanding, "Stay in the kitchen!  Don't even THINK about turning around!"  Soon he emerged from the bedroom, suddenly curious when I would be leaving the apartment to run the last errands of the day.

On Christmas morning, we snuggled up in the soft leather of our couch and began opening an impressive collection of gifts for just two adults.  We sipped coffee and admired the gifts our family had chosen for us.  We saved our big gifts for each other until the very end, with my small envelope for Mike looking quite puny next to an enormous box.  I started opening the paper, unleashing the tape from the shiny wrapping paper, wondering what could possibly be underneath and where we would possibly have room for it in our apartment.

Suddenly I was staring at the box for the brand-new, wasn't even supposed to ship until January, 27-inch iMac.  I fumbled for words and tears welled up in my eyes; Mike knew what was coming next and motioned for me to sit next to him on the couch and put his arm around me.  He soothed the pit in my stomach, telling me to stop comparing the costs of our gifts to each other.  He explained that more than a gift, the computer was his investment in me, in my budding photography business.  It was a means to replace my 13.5-inch Macbook that I had pushed to the limits, especially over the last year.

With just an hour before we were set to leave to see his family,  I started baking brioche rolls for breakfast and Mike ventured into our bedroom to begin setting up the computer.  He cleared off his desk that previously housed his own laptop and had served as his command center for studying and applications over the past year.  We got it up and running in no time at all and then checked-in with my family over Facetime.

I have had the past two days off from my job and have enjoyed setting-up the new workspace.  There just isn't space in our cozy 750 square foot apartment for two desks, let alone an actual office, so it is now a shared space, where I can work, blog, and edit photos (at lightning speed!) and Mike can remote into his office when needed and read his favorite sports websites on this huge, crystal-clear screen.  Mike's small Batman figurine (his good luck charm) watches over the desk. 

I absolutely adore my new computer and have loved working in our bedroom, as it is the only room in the apartment that receives sunlight.  I have hooked up the monster external hard drive my parents gave me, meaning my photos are now not only backed-up properly, but they are also off the hard drive, ensuring this computer stays super fast.  My parents also gave me a Wacom Tablet for Christmas and I am looking forward to adding my handwriting and doodles to some of our photos this year!

Though I have only had it for a few days, my biggest concern with having a desktop - feeling as though I was removed from Mike when I am working - hasn't really been an issue. Instead, it has made me recognize a stopping point in the evening and turn off the computer so I can go be with Mike.  With my laptop, I always had it on and was always working or reading blogs, even if I was sitting next to him, meaning it wasn't actually quality time together.  The past few nights, after I have turned off the computer, we have either played a game or read - actual books!  I am hoping this remains true once we are back on our normal, non-holiday schedule.

I feel like the luckiest girl in the world - not only to have this beautiful new machine to work on, but mostly to be marrying someone so thoughtful and sweet, someone who believes in me and everything I dare to dream.

City Sidewalks, Busy Sidewalks

A winter chill blew into the city last night along with gusts of rain, sleet, and snow.  I'm sitting here, cozy in one of Mike's fleece-lined flannel shirts and wrapping my hands around mug after mug of coffee to stay warm.  I have the next few days off from work and I'm looking forward to catching-up with friends, resuming our wedding planning, and spending lots of time organizing everything from the past year.  After a very hectic, very draining holiday season, these next few days will be just what I need to refuel for a new year.

I have lots of fun things to share - including a very special Christmas gift! - in this little space that I love so much, but feel as though I have neglected a bit this month.  But for today, I will just share one of my favorite photos from the season.  Stay cozy and warm today friends!

Duke University

In October, Mike and I took a very quick trip to Durham, North Carolina to visit Duke University for his first MBA interview.  We stayed in a hotel that I'm pretty certain was a set for a horror movie, so we weren't exactly excited to return once the interview was complete.  Since it was a game day, we were pretty limited from driving on campus so, after meeting with some of the current partners, we walked the winding stone paths campus.

The chapel was just as beautiful as we had remembered from touring many years ago.  We ventured closer to the dorms, with students gleefully enjoying the festivities of the day.  I leaned over to Mike and whispered, "I feel old!"; Mike nodded in agreement.  We watched the first half of the football game in the sweltering Carolina sun and then walked back through the campus towards a delicious dinner at Mateo.

  

CrossFit Metropolis Holiday ThrowdownCrossFit Photographer

This past Saturday was the Holiday Throwdown at my gym, CrossFit Metropolis.  Much like the  throwdown in September, the morning consisted of placing each member of the gym on one of four teams.  But this time, Santa hats, dradles, tinsel, elf ears, Christmas sweater vests, and bells were involved!  This throwdown was all about lifting lots of heavy weights as well as a bit of strategy.  The space became more packed as the morning progressed and the cheering and screaming soon made the energy of the gym a very inspiring place to be, with each person pushing and exceeding their limits.

I completed the workout during the first class of the morning, then happily stuck around to snap some pictures of the remaining classes, trying to dodge weights, athletes, and cheerleaders along the way.  Brunch and bottomless mimosas followed the throwdown, making me pretty confident that I belong to the best gym in the world!

Hot Bread Kitchen's Night Market

Last Thursday night, I headed uptown to Harlem for the annual fundraiser at Hot Bread Kitchen.  Not even an incredibly pesky, lingering cold could keep me from enjoying the evening.  My boss introduced me to this amazing organization almost two years ago and I have so loved learning more about their programs, success stories, and impacts in the community.  Hot Bread Kitchen is a bakery (and so much more) that employs immigrant women who might traditionally have difficulty finding work in a new country, or might be chastised for even dreaming of doing so.  These women share and produce the breads of their homelands and childhoods and, in turn, receive culinary training, English classes, and job-placement assistance.

The evening was filled with many supporters, lots of delicious dishes, and a bubbly glass of hard cider.  Perhaps my favorite moment was watching the hands-on demonstration of making m'smen, though not more than eating a piece right off the griddle.  Afterwards there were more treats – cookies from Dorie Greenspan and a tour of the tiny kitchen that now produces all things sweet for her newly launched company, Beurre & Sel.

If you would like to learn more about this organization, FOOD & WINE wrote a great piece, complete with a few recipes, on Hot Bread kitchen a few years ago.  Or you can head straight to the official website.  And if you are in New York City, you are lucky enough to have their breads offered at many retailers and green markets!

Our Halloween

Our Halloween was very quiet.  In a city still trying to get back on her feet after Hurricane Sandy, it hardly felt like a day for celebration.  It was hard to wrap my head around handing out candy when almost the entirety of downtown Manhattan continues to be without power, water, food.

Mike walked home from the office last night, as subways were at a standstill and packed buses were stuck in heavy traffic.  After dinner, I baked a fresh batch of Halloween Monster Cookies and we watched our favorite Halloween specials before calling it a night.  Simple and sweet.

Hurricane Sandy

At about noon yesterday, Mike and I were going a bit stir crazy having been hunkering in our tiny (yet resilient!) apartment for close to 48 hours.  We put on our rain jackets and boots, then ventured outdoors to assess the damage in our neighborhood.  We were not alone: throngs of people were walking the sidewalks, squinting at just a hint of sunshine peeking through the rain clouds.  

The Upper East Side of Manhattan fared incredibly well - somehow the raging winds spared almost every tree and our block did not experience any flooding.  We slowly walked east, towards the FDR and East River, which we knew was underwater the day before.  It was eerie to see this thoroughfare completely empty, except for the occasional police vehicle that appeared to discourage people from hopping into the middle of the street to take photos.

We know how lucky we are to have power and no damage.  Most people we know in other neighborhoods have no power.  Our subways and trains remain at a standstill.  Residents of Hoboken are trying to evacuate, as their food and water supplies are dwindling.  But I woke this morning to the loud sound of sirens and honking cars, a sure sign that our city is beginning the long road to recovery.

CrossFit Metropolis: Team ThrowdownCrossFit Photographer

On Saturday morning, my alarm clock sounded at seven o'clock.  I groaned and stretched and wished for another hour of sleep.  But soon enough my feet hit the cold wooden floors and I was awake.  I sleepily put in my contacts, brushed my teeth, and put on the workout clothes I could find between yawns.  I was up early to hit the gym and get in an early weekend workout.

But it wasn't just any workout and I don't belong to just any gym.  Today was the team throwdown at CrossFit Metropolis.  Every member in our gym was placed on one of four teams - teams that inevitably came up with colors and dirty-minded names - and each person's performance contributed to their team's overall performance.  After warm-ups and stretching, we were told the WOD (workout of the day): a 10 minute AMRAP (as many reps as possible) of a 200m row (with the damper on the highest setting), followed by 20 burpees.  Essentially the workout looked like this: row 200m, do 20 burpees, row 200m, do 20 burpees...and so on for 10 minutes.  Your score was the total number of burpees you completed.  Sound easy?  Yeah, most of the CrossFit workouts look easy on paper.

There were a total of four classes throughout Saturday morning.  I competed in the first class of the day, then stuck around to snap some photos and cheer on the other members.  I love my gym and the people who make up this community:  best friends and roommates, husbands and wives, mothers and daughters, fathers and sons, coaches and personal trainers, MMA fighters and newbies thinking, "What the hell did I get myself into?"  I love that every single person was there cheering on everyone going through those 10 minutes of misery.  I love the entire gym lining up 100th Street and cheering the teammates sprinting for extra points; I love the neighborhood leaning out of their windows and doors to cheer right along with us.

Saturday, like every day in this gym, was about pushing our limits.  Every person received a healthy dose of encouragement - pure, from the heart screams and cheers and dance parties - and not one single person quit.  Isn't it incredible what we can accomplish with an amazingly supportive community behind us?

*UPDATE: You can now view all of the photos from the event on the CrossFit Metropolis Facebook Page!